2002-04-04 - 12:56 p.m.
So I took a quick lap around the diary loop and saw that a large number of folks are having religious experiences of late.
Not terribly surprising, since it's Eastertime and all. I know the Catholic Church finishes up it's initiation process right at Easter, and I imagine it's probably about the same for most of the big Christian denominations.
Jewish folks just celebrated passover as well. It wouldn't surprise me to find out that just about all of the "Bigtime" religions had major renewal ceremonies right around now...it's Spring and all.
Me. I have no religion. I suppose I could claim Catholicism, but only to the extent that someone who was thrown out by the Bishop of Lincoln, Nebraska can claim to be a member of anything.
Yes, that's right...I'm an officially excommunicated Catholic...and I'm proud of it...well...at least I'm not ashamed of it.
"How in the heck did you manage that, Gorm?" Why, I'm glad you asked...sit right down friends and neighbors and I'll tell you about the wonders of the "One true, holy, Catholic Church", and just how not one it can be.
I came into the Catholic Church of my own free will my Junior Year of College, starting pretty much from nothing.
See...my parents hadn't brought me up in any religion at all. They avoid it like the plague. This is because of a major flap when they were married.
Mom's family is *devoutly* Boston Roman Catholic (Yes, Boston Roman Catholic...it's different than a lot of other Roman Catholics out there, we'll get to that). My father's family is Unitarian, if anything.
So, come 1971 when they want to get married, my Mom's family insists on it being a Catholic wedding. Dad's family was all like "well sure, that's cool, we don't care, we're Unitarians, God is God and that's good enough"
Problem...Monsignor Mann, the local Parish Priest. He wouldn't perform the ceremony unless my father converted to Catholicism.
That's right, not just attend some "What's it like to be married to a Catholic?" classes, not even attend the retreats and stuff, full fledged get the shower with holy water ,have oil put on your forehead and recite the Apostolic Creed converted.
Vatican II hadn't quite taken hold yet, apparently.
He was less than enthused by this prospect, and said "Why no, no thank you".
So they ended up getting married in another Church, not the Unitarian one (it was booked). It was Methodist, I think, but I could be wrong.
Nine months later (to the day...) I come along. Funny that. Mom had had so many medical problems she was supposed to be infertile, even should she have conceived a kid she wasn't supposed to be able to carry it to term. Dad wasn't allegedly all that virile himself. But, nine months after their wedding night, I pop out (in the middle of a snowstorm, I might add).
So Mom's family insists on a christening. Mom and Dad are all good with this, and the plans are made. Monsignor Mann's secretary schedules it without giving it a second thought.
We all show up on the day, and the Church is locked up.
Mom and Dad, thinking someone must have just forgotten to unlock the door or something, go around to the rectory and find Monsignor Mann there.
He says that he won't perform the ceremony because they aren't married and I'm a bastard child and condemned to Hell.
(Funny...I don't seem to recall reading that in the Bible anywhere...I must have skipped that page.)
So there is a BIG fight. Like knockdown, dragout, arguing, almost divorcing kinda thing. Mostly over how in the heck could he be that way and how could my father refuse to convert (that from my Grandmother mostly), and so on and so on.
So they end up deciding that they are married according to the State of Massachusetts, and that's all they really care about.
They're still happily married today. Monsignor Mann retired many years ago...so far as I know without any accusations of pedophilia, but I can't swear to that for certain.
But the practical upshot was that they decided that religion was just going to be a bit too touchy of a subject, so they would leave me to make up my own mind. Not knowing I had a mind to make up, I chose not to worry about it until College.
Coming next entry...entering the Church in Illinois, and rather enjoying it.
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